One Year and One Hope

Today marks two significant milestones for our family. It is one year since the placement of Joe and Daniel in our home, and it is the end of the 90-day window in which Kiki's relatives can intervene on her behalf.

Most people probably wonder how we ended up with three children so close in age. We originally agreed to take the boys after we were told Kiki was only going to be a temporary placement. We figured we could handle all three if it was just for a few weeks. We could have asked that Kiki go to another foster home, but we were already too attached to her and we knew there was still a slim chance she would become available for adoption. During the next several months that tiny hope grew, and yet at times it also diminished greatly.

The day the boys arrived I remember looking out the window, seeing the CPS workers taking them out of the car, and thinking how unreal it was that these little boys were just taken from their grandparents' home and would now be living with us. When they came inside our house Joe cried a little bit and Daniel smiled at me. I remember giving Joe a sippy cup with milk and some blocks to play with. He wasn't too interested in the milk, but he liked the blocks. That night I went to Wal-Mart to buy clothes for the boys because all they came with were the outfits they were wearing. (It still boggles my mind that they didn't come with any other clothes or even any toys.) I took Kiki with me (she was only a month old) and Billy stayed home with the boys. It was a cold night. I cried as I pushed the cart into the store because I was heartbroken about Kiki having to leave us and I was terrified at the thought of taking care of all three children together in the meantime. It was late, I was overwhelmed, and I was questioning our decision to take the boys.

Back then we were drowning in diapers and formula and sleepless nights. Today we are still drowning in diapers, but now we have toddlers and laughter and tantrums and silliness. Our lives have settled into a manageable and yes, enjoyable routine. Through it all God has been guiding us and leading us to fully trust in His will for our family. For that we are humbly thankful. We continue to pray and trust and hope that our little Kiki will soon officially become little sister to Joe and Daniel.