Prayers Needed

There is a family in our congregation that has suffered an unspeakable tragedy and is in desperate need of prayer right now.  Please, please go to Jamie's blog for details and read how you can help.  Thanks.

An Announcement

I've been thinking for several days the best way to share some big news from our household. I think Billy and I have caused those of you who already know to question our sanity, but rest assured that we have made the following decision prayerfully and thoughtfully and are at peace with it. In fact, we are quite excited!

We will begin fostering a newborn boy sometime this week!

Last Friday we received a call from CPS informing us that Joe and Daniel's birth mother had just given birth to another baby. Because the goal is to keep siblings together, we were asked to be the placement. We were given less than 24 hours to decide if we would accept the baby into our home. To be honest, we struggled at first. That very week we felt like we had finally reached a point where life felt somewhat relaxed: the house was finished, Billy was finished with summer school, and the kids were in a comfortable summer routine. Our selfish natures struggled with the idea of disrupting our relative peace. But we've always left ourselves open to a fourth child, and a closer look at the timing led us to believe this is what God wants for us. Unlike his brothers, this baby was born full term. Had he been born a week or two earlier, while we were neck-deep in home repairs, I don't think we could have said yes. Billy still has a few weeks left before school begins, so he will be home to help during the initial adjustment period. We're also still current on our foster care certifications and trainings. If we waited a year before taking in any more children (which is what we thought we would do), it would be a lot harder to get our license renewed simply because of all the classes we would have to re-take. Deep down I wonder if we would really have done it.

I do worry too much about what people think. I don't want people to think we're crazy. I don't want people to think we want attention. I don't want people to think we're doing it for the money. I do want people to understand that Billy and I love our children and want our family to be everything that God wants it to be. We believe He will give us the strength to not just survive, but to thrive as a family. We also understand that there is a real possibility that this may not be the last baby this woman has. I would ask that you pray not just for us, but for her to get the help she needs to get her life on track.

Right now the baby is still in the hospital. We don't know if he has a name, and we don't know when he will be released. The kids, especially Joe, are excited about their new baby brother. We really don't know much of anything else about the case, just hoping that if it is God's will for us, that this little baby will someday become another permanent addition to our family! I'll keep you posted. :)

Meet Mikea!

Our little sweetheart is now legally, officially, 100% ours! I will post pictures from the adoption ceremony later on, but for now enjoy the ones above, kindly taken and put together by our friend Jamie. Thanks, Jamie! And thank you to everyone who has been praying for us the past 19 months. Our prayers have been answered above and beyond what we ever dreamed! Praise God!

One Year and One Hope

Today marks two significant milestones for our family. It is one year since the placement of Joe and Daniel in our home, and it is the end of the 90-day window in which Kiki's relatives can intervene on her behalf.

Most people probably wonder how we ended up with three children so close in age. We originally agreed to take the boys after we were told Kiki was only going to be a temporary placement. We figured we could handle all three if it was just for a few weeks. We could have asked that Kiki go to another foster home, but we were already too attached to her and we knew there was still a slim chance she would become available for adoption. During the next several months that tiny hope grew, and yet at times it also diminished greatly.

The day the boys arrived I remember looking out the window, seeing the CPS workers taking them out of the car, and thinking how unreal it was that these little boys were just taken from their grandparents' home and would now be living with us. When they came inside our house Joe cried a little bit and Daniel smiled at me. I remember giving Joe a sippy cup with milk and some blocks to play with. He wasn't too interested in the milk, but he liked the blocks. That night I went to Wal-Mart to buy clothes for the boys because all they came with were the outfits they were wearing. (It still boggles my mind that they didn't come with any other clothes or even any toys.) I took Kiki with me (she was only a month old) and Billy stayed home with the boys. It was a cold night. I cried as I pushed the cart into the store because I was heartbroken about Kiki having to leave us and I was terrified at the thought of taking care of all three children together in the meantime. It was late, I was overwhelmed, and I was questioning our decision to take the boys.

Back then we were drowning in diapers and formula and sleepless nights. Today we are still drowning in diapers, but now we have toddlers and laughter and tantrums and silliness. Our lives have settled into a manageable and yes, enjoyable routine. Through it all God has been guiding us and leading us to fully trust in His will for our family. For that we are humbly thankful. We continue to pray and trust and hope that our little Kiki will soon officially become little sister to Joe and Daniel.

Reality Check

We are halfway through the 90-day waiting period in which Kiki's relatives can intervene to try to obtain custody of her. During this time I have stopped dwelling on how awful it will be to lose her because it's too painful.

But nothing is certain, of course. Last weekend Billy and I took a CPR class with another foster-adopt couple who had gone through 8 foster children and had so far only been able to adopt two of them. They lost one little girl after two entire years of parenting her. In most of their cases relatives came out of the woodwork at the last moment to take custody. This frightens us.

A little over a week will be one year since Kiki came to live with us and that means we will then have legal standing and if we have to fight to keep her, we will. Ultimately we know that God has a plan for our family and whether Kiki is a temporary or permanent part of it is in His hands. That is a comfort.

A Blessing

We are so thankful that Mount Calvary streams its services live on Sunday mornings. Today the babies had runny noses and J. had a cough so we stayed home. We hate not being able to attend, but this is the next best thing. Before we had the background checks on the nursery workers this was the only way we could "attend" for a few weeks. (Billy and I took turns going by ourselves with J.)

Yes, we make J. watch. He sat on my lap during the sermon, just like he does when we're actually there (or Billy's lap). He does really well at church. I think it's because it's the one time all week when he gets to have both Mommy and Daddy to himself. The nursery staff does a great job of taking care of D. and M., so everything usually works out great.

I pray for good health for everyone next week so we can attend again. I didn't get to go last week, either, because Billy was at the Men's Retreat. I miss church.

Happy Ascension Day

Even if O.P. Kretzmann wasn't my grandfather's second cousin, I would still share this with you.

Ninety Days

Today is the 90th day since parental rights were terminated for the boys. This time is given for any other family members to intervene in the case. As of last week no one had made contact with the caseworker so if we don't hear anything today, we should be able to adopt! There is also another six month waiting period before the adoption can be finalized, but we have been told that the judge will likely count the time they've already been with us, which is nearly five months. We don't know how long the adoption process will take, but we are overjoyed and thankful to God that we are one step closer.

Thank you to everyone who has prayed for us and the children. Please continue to pray, especially that Baby Girl M.'s situation will be resolved. Her status with us continues to change and the pattern lately is that her stay continues to be extended. This gives us some hope. We cannot imagine having to give her up, but we are also trying to stay grounded. We find comfort in knowing that God will do what is best.

"We know that in all things God works for the good of those who love Him, who have been called according to His purpose." Romans 8:28

Adventures at Wal-Mart

After church yesterday we went out to run some errands. By the time we made it to Wal-Mart, our fifth stop, I was beginning to wonder if we were pressing our luck with the babies. Everyone was awake and happy for the time being, but you just never know. But I had some items I needed to return, we were completely out of formula, and we've been wanting to get a second high chair for Baby Girl M. for several weeks now so we decided to go through with it.

About 30 minutes later the infants started getting restless, and I realized we left the bottles in the van. Billy offered to go get them, but we were all the way in the back of the store and I just wanted to get done and go home. So I ended up carrying one baby and pushing the stroller and Billy carried the other baby and pushed J. in the cart. We hurried through the rest of the trip, just getting the items for WIC we had left. We actually found a check-out lane that was empty (that never happens at Wal-Mart!) and it looked like we were going to make it. But when our checker got to the cereal, she told us we had the wrong size. WIC requires two 18 oz. boxes, and I had grabbed 12 oz. boxes. Nothing more, nothing less is allowed. We either had to put the rest of J.'s WIC items back (milk, juice, beans, eggs, and cheese) or go get new cereal.

At the very moment that we made this realization, both D. and M. started crying at the same time. It was unreal. I grabbed D. and practically ran back to the cereal aisle to get replacements. I did not make eye contact with the lady in line behind us because I figured she had to be annoyed with us. When I got back to the line I signed the voucher and whisked the babies out to the van to be fed and changed.

When Billy came out with J. and our groceries, he said that the checkout lady (and the lady behind us) had been very nice and even asked for our names so she could pray for us. She said to come back to her lane the next time we were at Wal-Mart. We have been blessed so many times by the kind words of strangers and a lot more offers of prayer than one might expect. There is no way we could do what we are doing without God's help!